Well, it's been a lot longer than I thought it would be before I got back to writing another post! Events seem to be accelerating as our time in Europe comes closer to an end. We have put the three-month notice in to leave our apartment, found another tenant and got him approved, and also put in the two-month notice of resignation for our jobs. A lot of bittersweet feelings right now. Sweet with regards to leaving these jobs from Hell, but bitter when it comes to leaving Switzerland. I know that I have often been critical and mocking about Switzerland in the past, but most of that criticism stemmed from the raft of negative feelings engendered by our work situation. Switzerland as a country and culture has slowly but surely grown on us(although the number of chain smokers here, in a country that seems to value health, fitness, and nature so much, still beggars my belief). I am a bit too critical by nature(something I have to work on), and I know that I have been somewhat harsh in the past, so from now on I will try, with a few exceptions, to focus on all the positives of planet Switzerland.

First of all, though, I've got to say that it was sad to see America knocked out of the World Cup. They put up a great effort, especially that goalie!, and I think they should have made it at least another round, if it weren't for all the bad officiating, and the ridiculous cheating. FIFA should really allow more technology to be used. This is the twenty-first century, not the nineteenth, and the sport should be allowed to evolve. All in all, though, I think this team really did it's part to increase American interest in a sport we have always had so little regard for. I'm certainly more interested in it, and that says a lot! I also learned that I am far from the only person that takes issue with the sleazy, underhanded tactics that a lot of players in this game use to try and win at any cost. The actions that I so rightfully lambasted in my last post are called "flopping", and the American team and coach spent some time complaining about them during one of the news conferences last week. Kudos to America for standing up for what's right. I've got to be critical here, and say that these tactics utilized by so many soccer players around the world are the most disgusting, unsportsmanlike actions I've ever seen in professional sports. They take everything that 'sportsmanship' is supposed to stand for, and violate it. If I was in charge, I'd have every millionaire athlete that was caught doing it hung up by their thumbs, and have every member of the opposing team kick 'em where the sun doesn't shine, then expel them from professional soccer for the rest of their lives. This activity, in my opinion, puts such a massive stain on the entire game of soccer, that it shouldn't be televised or promoted until it is completely eradicated. Enough said.

One more little issue regarding soccer. That's right....Soccer. Americans get a lot of crap for calling "football" by the name of "soccer", while the rest of the world calls it by its supposed 'real' name. For any non-Americans who ever read this blog, especially the English, here's a little truth for you; in approximately 1863, when a group of men in England got together to formally codify the rules of soccer, they created an organization called the Association of Football, in order to differentiate it from the Rugby Football League. As the English have a penchant for making words more informal by abbreviating or shortening them, they took the 3rd, 4th, and 5th letters of the word 'association', added 'cer' to the end, and came up with the word 'soccer' for their beloved new sport. From that point and for the next century or so, the word 'soccer' was used more commonly in England to describe the sport than the word 'football' was. It was only the pressure and influence from the rest of the world that led the British to eventually drop the original name, and just stick with 'football'. So, it can easily be argued that Americans are more truly sticking to the original....and uniquely British, name of the game, and that the British themselves are being unfaithful to the name they themselves invented! So, for all those who think Americans are ignorant and foolish for the calling the game 'soccer', stick that in your pipe and smoke it!

It's definitely time to say a little something about my Mom's visit, seeing as how she has already been safely back home for a couple of weeks now! My Mom was the only one among my relatives who came to visit me. I know my Dad really wanted to, but unfortunately he has run out of time, seeing as how we will be flying back to the States at the end of September. Also, just to be official, any past offers to friends and family to come and visit us are hereby rescinded. Sorry, you missed your chance! We're just going to have our hands too full for the next 2 1/2 months to deal with guests, other than those that had already been scheduled.

We had planned three weeks for my Mom's visit, thinking that would be enough time to show her the highlights of Switzerland. It wasn't. Fortunately, I think she was still very happy with all the things she was able to see and do. Better something than nothing, right? She also went off to London for three nights, all by herself, and made it back alive! I felt like a proud parent. She navigated buses, trains, planes, shuttles, made all her connections and changes, traipsed her way through all the right terminals, actually found her hotel, got all the right tickets, saw all the sights she wanted to, changed currencies, fed and cleaned herself, and then did it all again on the way back. Hurray for Mom! (Bear in mind, my Mom is 70 years old, has done very little traveling of this complexity and stress in her life, especially by herself in multiple foreign countries, and is easily confused).

We also traveled up and down, and through, many mountains (by various conveyances), rode on several ferries, witnessed numerous waterfalls, lots of lakes, a run of rivers, innumerable villages, towns, and cities, incredible castles, ancient cathedrals, manifold museums, a surfeit of souvenir shops, tons of towers, glaciers, five countries, and overall more beauty than you can shake a stick at. I drove her from Lucerne, through parts of Switzerland, into Lichtenstein, up into Austria, still farther up into Germany to Munich, to Neuschwanstein castle(the castle that was the inspiration for Walt Disney's castle!), and back again. I took her to ancient, hidden valleys where the homes were all built out of native rock on the slopes of the canyon walls, the streams were crystal blue, and the scenery was out of this world. I took her to Italian-influenced towns in the south, via dozens of long tunnels carved through the Alps. I took her to the tops of mountains...the tops of waterfalls.... the tops of old watch towers and city walls... the tops of massive dams... and the tops of churches and ancient city halls. Poetic, yes? And all the while it was like traveling with a stubborn old mule. That's right, you heard me, I just likened my own Mom to a mule. I think that she would be the first to agree with this assessment.

The primary reason, among others, that I have referred to my Mom as a mule is because of the speed with which she chooses to walk. Although you really couldn't call it a walk. More of a stroll or a ramble. Maybe saunter would be the correct word. Yes, that's it, a slow saunter is the perfect way to describe my Mother's speed of movement, no matter the conditions, no matter the time table involved, or the pace necessary at the moment to achieve the desired conclusion. She will not be hurried, come hell or high water. Now, when you combine this propensity for sauntering, with my propensity for scheduling every nanosecond of every day and trying to stuff as many activities into every daylight hour as utterly possible, you might imagine some issues would arise. I would try every trick in the book to get her to speed up, all to no avail. I would try and point out and describe as many sights to her as I could find, all while attempting to increase our momentum without her noticing, only to find myself talking to the air while my Mom was twenty paces behind me. Or I would simply walk faster and faster, leaving her farther and farther behind me, in the hopes that she would fear getting lost and attempt to catch up. No dice. I would place my hand unobtrusively on her back, or around her shoulders, and push a little in the hopes this would work, but she always slithered away. Slippery as an eel she is. I attempted to use the power of my mind to imagine a large rubber band connected to both of us, and if I got far enough ahead of her, she would be flung up to my side once the rubber band reached it's limit. I apparently have a weak mind. I even used reverse psychology on her by walking slower and slower myself, hoping that she would see how slow we were going, and would therefore want to catch up with the general flow of traffic...or at least be shamed into it. No go. We simply slowly came to a complete stop, with hundreds of people flowing around us, and my Mom seemed to be content with this. Inexplicable.

On top of the walking issues, my Mom likes to stop and sit frequently, usually combining this activity with a latte machiato and a pastry or ice cream. How she could have worked up an appetite after walking so slowly I will never know, but there you go. Obviously, this conflicted with my nanosecond scheduling tendencies. To top it all off, she was also in need of a nap every afternoon! After sleeping 9 hours or more the previous night! I honestly don't know how my Mom ever gets anything done. She is most definitely enjoying her retirement, no problems there. So, you can see how I might liken my Mom to a stubborn old mule, and be entirely justified in doing so, can't you? Love you, Mom!

In the end, though, I think my Mom's visit was a complete success. I spent a lot of quality time with her, she got to see and experience enough of Switzerland and London to get a real feel for it, and there were no major mishaps. I think she saw just about everything she really wanted to see, at her own pace, and that's all that's important.

Next Blog I have to go over Timi's and my trip to the Black forest in Germany, the headwaters of the Danube, and Europa park, Europe's version of Disneyland. Tomorrow we head for another vacation to the Italian and French Riviera's. My work is never done. I have sooooooo much to write about, and only a couple of months or so to do it in! There are so many aspects of Switzerland and Swiss culture that I have barely touched on. Hopefully, when we return from our next trip, I will have enough time to write several Blogs in a short period of time, since we will have more time off from work, and nowhere we need to be. Check back in a week or so, and if you can think of anything to say, leave a comment! See ya!

I'm back, Baby!

To all my legions of fans, thank you for hanging in there and not giving up hope for another post, I appreciate your support, you're the reason I do this.

On a somewhat more serious note, it is good to be writing about my experiences again, it has been a really long time. My Mom came for a three week visit, which was great, but it really took up all my extra time, attention, and energy. On top of that, my computer is in the guest room and I do most of my writing late at night, which is when my Mom is sleeping. Very inconsiderate of her. Why can't she just stay up every night till 4 in the morning like me? Anyway, I don't even know where to start, there is so much to write about; my experiences with my Mom during her visit, new developments at work, new plans for the future, the relentless, mind numbing, soul-crushing, despair-filling, suicidal-thought inducing weather, World Cup Soccer, and so much more. So let's just do this!

I have never been interested in professional, televised sports. I just seem to have been born without that gene. I've always considered watching a bunch of overpaid, spoiled adult men playing a game for the highest bidder a serious waste of my time. Or maybe it was because it was never a part of the routine and ritual of my childhood, that it never became an occasion or opportunity for bonding with my dad or brother. Although this didn't seem to stop this very same brother from becoming obsessed with watching sports himself, at least later in life. I think maybe he picked it up in the military, because I don't really recall him watching too many sporting events while we lived in the same house, though this could be because we grew up with access to only 3 TV channels(4 if you include periodic PBS access, but you usually had to watch that out of the side of your eyes because the reception was so bad), only one of which came in very well, as well as the fact that we didn't get a color TV until I was well-advanced into my upbringing. Early adopters we were not. I always wondered why they insinuated "Little House on the Prairie" occurred in the past, because those kid's daily life seemed to have a lot in common with mine. Here is an excerpt from my childhood: "I'm done with choppin' the firewood Pa, so after I'm done tendin' to the animals can I go down and clean up in the creek?" "Why sure son, but first you'll have to go weed the garden, muck out the stalls, and check the perimeter fence. We don't want any varmints gettin' into the tomaters now do we? And by the way, the house isn't gonna paint itself, now is it? So get hoppin'!" Maybe that exact scenario never happened, I'm not sure, but I was a country boy, and no doubt about it. So how in the heck did I end up in Switzerland? I am most definitely a long way from home. "Country roaaaaaaads, take me hoooome, to a plaaaaaace I belooooong, central Oregon, mountain mamaaa, take me hoooooome, country roaaads". Don't misunderstand me, I had a great childhood, wouldn't change it for the world, and a curious side benefit of being worked like a slave by my parents for most of it is that every 'real' job that I've had since seems like a walk in the park by comparison!

Anyway, with World Cup fever gripping the entirety of Europe, I can't help but absorb a little twinge of interest in Soccer, or Futball as it is called over here. I know that the United States is not a "Soccer country", that the average American finds soccer about as interesting as a root canal, but the level of interest in Soccer over here in the father land surpasses that of Jesus. Even here in Switzerland, the land of no emotion, they can't get enough of it(especially considering they beat Spain the other day, which I gather from the reaction here is a feat equivalent to Cuba successfully invading and conquering the United States). Go figure. Like I said, though, even I am following the events of the World Cup loosely, and it was quite satisfying when the U.S. tied England, for whom soccer seems to be more important than breathing. How about that American goalie?! He stopped just about everything they kicked at him. Poor England. They've fallen from once being the rulers of most of the known world, to not being able to beat one of their former colonies at a game that the average American places on par with canned cheese in importance. Ah, the ignominy of it all!

Let's go over a couple of the idiosyncrasies of soccer. For one, how can so much of the world's population be so interested in a game that is about as interesting as watching a person on a starvation diet? Alright, nothing happening but a bunch of little men running back and forth on a field of grass and kicking a ball to each other......................nothing going on, nothing going on, nothing going on, nothing going on, nothing going on.........................nothing going on, nothing going on, nothing going on ............................... "What's that, you say? Somebody scored a goal? Hallelujah!"

For two, how can a sport be so popular that features a bunch of fully grown men, all of whom are millionaires, all of whom are simply playing for the team that is willing to pay them the most, regardless of where they come from, or where their cultural loyalties may lie, and who are such a bunch of pansies?! I'm referring, of course, to the inclination of these so-called athletes to fall down, clutch various extremities, and gyrate and cry like babies whenever an opponent touches them. Have you ever seen such a bunch of woosies in your life??!! I realize that these over dramatized, over-acted productions are for the benefit of the referees, and that their intent is to get a foul card called on the opponent, but how can they possibly live with themselves afterwards? As for myself, my pride and sense of self worth could never allow for me to act in this humiliating and emasculating fashion. And everybody knows it! Sometimes these guys really do get hurt, I know that, but it seems more often than not that when the incident is replayed on camera, everyone in the world who is watching can see that the alleged foul was not a foul at all, but at most a light nick on the calf, or something such as a 6-month old baby with colic would not get too upset about. Nothing is worth this. Yes, perhaps by falling down and acting as if my leg had just been ripped off by a Grizzly bear every time a member of the other team grazes my shin would help my team to win, but where is the fairness and sportsmanship in that? Where is the basic human decency? And is it worth it to have an embarrassing nickname for the rest of your life? Whenever they go out with their friends, they should have to introduce themselves like this to the ladies: "Hey, how you doin'? My name's 'Katie Crybaby', and these here are my friends 'Susie Sniffles', and 'Mommy's Boy'. We're professional soccer players, and we make an obscene amount of money by sacrificing our worth as human beings in order to win a pointless game. Want to go out sometime?"? Man up, Europe and the rest of the world, stop trying to win by acting like 3-year old girls! No wonder this sport has never gained traction in the U.S. At least in America we only try and win by utilizing barely legal, secret technology, or by consuming massive quantities of illegal, performance-enhancing drugs, or by having one team's fans try and distract the other team by waving a bunch of colorful streamers or giant 'Number One' fingers. Only the respectable, tried-and-true methods for us, darn it!

Lastly, how can a sport of this caliber, played at this level of competitiveness, be able to end in a tie? Isn't the whole point of sports games to win? I realize now that the World Cup is based on overall points, and not just individual competitions, but isn't there a law or rule somewhere that says for every match there should be a victor? There should be. Watching a game that is this boring, and then having the teams tie, is really unfair.

That's all for now, so I'll go ahead and apologize to all the overly sensitive people who may read my blog and become insulted or offended by my views. So sorry.

I will be writing my next Blog very soon, hopefully tomorrow, so check back in the next couple of days. I have a lot more to write about, and I should be including some pictures next time. Stay tuned!